Worst Opening Lines EVER - part 2 (101 to 200)
Many thanks to everyone for the great feedback on my original "Worst Opening Lines EVER" blog. I love the idea of giving my friends a chuckle from time to time. And to receiving same as you've added your own stories in the comments!
While i knew when i started that there would be many noteworthy opening lines to include, i didn't really envision getting to the landmark 100th entry. As the original blog was getting to be unruly and a little overwhelming in its size, i figured that 100 was a good cutoff and that it was time to start a PART 2. I have a bit of a backlog as i've held off on starting this for a while.
So here we go...
1. have you ever taken a young man's virginity?
2. i would love to go so harsh on you
3. I'd like to take you out on the street. Your fully naked only wearing a dog collar and a dildo I shove up your pussy. Me wearing a black suit. I don't fuck you yet. But I push the dildo up your pussy quite hard. I can tell you're dripping wet. So you're wearing that dog collar walking in front of me on all 4. I kick your ass because your too slow. We reach the main road. It's quite an embarrassing situation. It's cold and it's dark and just imagine your neighbors seeing you like that...I make you knee. Cars drive by. I open my pants and get out my cock and balls. I make you smell my balls and suck them. My cock is all over your face. You look so hot with my cock on your face. My cock is not yet rock hard but it's quite big yet. So now it's your turn to make me really hard and suck me. Tell me how you're going to do it! Be precise, filthy and naughty!
4. hi there.. interested in having fun? :P... salut tu aimerais qu'on se fasse du plaisir :P
5. You're a really hot woman http://xhamster.living/photos/view/5982933-103547383.html
http://xhamster.living/photos/view/5982933-104058731.html
I hope you like my cock!! Can you speak italian?
6. Hi ! How are you ? Hmm... You have perfect pics... It's really exciting... Are you interested by a young man how want to make you cum... ?
7. i d love to make you my slave! and please you as much as you want!
8. heyhey, maybe you will like this?
http://xhamster.living/movies/5350108/bestial.html
http://xhamster.living/movies/4885595/training_a_whore.html
http://xhamster.living/movies/1745195/extreme_german_gangbang_with_ginger_lang.html
happy greetings from germany. nice vids you have :)
9. luv 2 tie u up and fuck ur ass and more
10. Hi bitch im french dom no limits
11. I am trying to face up to the fact that I am a pain loving, crossdressed sissy ******. any advice?
12. id take you anywhere slave.....
13. I am a young Italian-Arabic
1.92 and DICK 23 cm
OK?
14. hi, Can you give me a wide open mouth pic to tribute?
15. i want to put my dick between these lips
16. Too bad, you're almost my mom's age, and I so want to discipline that bitch, for the c***dhood I had ..... but I respect your choice, hope you get from this sire what you're looking for, cheers
17. hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii i am siisy boy like sex i love all kind my ass so sexy and i have nice cock
18. here is a nice guy with a hard throbbing 9-inch-dick which did not cum for 6 days now. As you might guess, I am really horny right now, and I really would love to cum for a nice woman watching me releasing that huge, big load.
Message me back if you are that kind of woman :)
I have skype or yahoo :)
19. i was wondering if u would take my virginity. im 18 asian 5'5 dick, in markham. willing to travel to north york. into older woman
20. id let u tie me up n force me to cum or ruin my cumshot js..
21. Hello!
My dream is to be seduced by a milf as well as make a porno, watch it and fuck to it again
http://xhamster.living/movies/298288/booboo_kitty_foxx_maturesrock.html
this is one of my favorite videos ;) fast forward to 5:40 to the best then let me know what you think
http://xhamster.living/movies/4287138/nina_hartley_stunning_white_ass.html
Actually this is my favorite, start at 10:39 ;)
Send me some links of stuff you think id like, or your favorites as well
22. Peace be upon you..
I will pour my heart into this one.. Once and for all.
I am sorry, and I humbly ask for your forgiveness for approaching you with my selfish desires.. and I hope I have never caused you to get sexually attracted to me.
It’s like I was intending to use you,
I know you think it’s ok since its two adults with consent, but no it’s not.
You are so much greater than what you think you are.
I don’t care if you are single or married, with k**s or not, I am a Muslim, and my view on women is something that the media tend to cover with the oppression..
It’s not like women are all about being covered in black, it’s totally not like this.
You are jewelry, you are the source of beauty in this universe, and you are so precious.
I don’t want my wife, daughters or grand daughters to face things like this, to face people who approach them without actual caring about them, just for sexual gratification.
Romance in marriage do exist, just like the flowers, sunset and sunrise do exist.
And in my opinion, this life is nothing but a test , you have that free will that nobody can take from you, we all have our fantasies and things, and The God knows that, but we really need to adjust them, and this is the role of marriage.
In my religion, sec out of marriage is a major sin, and stoning is not it’s punishment as many tend to represent , many scholars believe that and it’s stated in The Qur’an . but still it’s a major sin .. Just as it’s the same in actual Christianity, the real one in which Jesus “peace be upon him” is a great prophet, but not the son of The God, just like The Islam says and the original Judaism, and all the Abrahamic monotheistic religions.
Porn is bad, we may get around this fact for years and just come to it after long years that we may not even be alive to see, just as many scientists were fought when they think the earth is round!
Seriously is this the future that we want to our c***dren and the younger generations? a future in which men and woman are trying so bad to get approved based on their images ? what about the hearts ?
Sex is not liberation, it’s the sweetest gift from The God that you can seek in Marriage.. but it outside of it, it’s our cage, and we are never free from these desires and high enough to real status of worth of us as human beings.
I know people have different circumstances, I know some are here for adventure, for money, for marriage conflicts, but all these things has solutions, it’s never as if this life is all about easiness, we get hardships and we cope and learn how to keep being at our best inspite of their presence.
This is not The Paradise.. This is Life. The place where we need to grow, to be ready for what’s coming .
I know the person on this page, He can help if He able too, whether its life advices or financial issues.. It’s a page on facebook, it’s name is “Allah you are the best to feel me” you can inbox it, or email this [email protected]
May The God bless you eternally with whom you love .
I am so sorry .
23. NICE COLLAR are you owned?
24. Hey, I'm stroking my cock on skype if you like, hockey.dad.6
25. cam sex?
26. Love your faves. It is hard to find a good white woman to tie up and enjoy. And to give her pleasure.
27. I want to sleep with you lady...
28. can i call you mom?
29. wowww nice tits come in my skype(ridlok) i love you
30. hi would u like meet me for weekly income?
31. i want you as my slave, train you and make you mine and if you want money i can pay you 4000$/month also i can travel to my slave
32. Umm sure would love to tie you up and slide my little dick up your ass and Cum all over you
33. hello whore thanks for adding me, if you are interested in chating about bdsm and fantasies feel free to reply, i enjoy abusing sluts like you [i hope it goes without saying that i did not add him...]
34. hi
Iam hamza
Iam single and so hot
i want to be my girlfriend if you interested
35. mmmm sweet submissive milf makes my cock hard
36. As very interested in you,nice sub,I have a proposal for you, of course if you can travel.I want to invite you for summer time holidays, in my villa on the sea front,for fun and holidays and let it see where it'll take us and guide you to become my loyal sub Lady,to serve and please Master who will take you to the dark side, and even beyond this, under His dominance and turn you to be His obedient sub, exploring your limits daily.I am on holidays from mid June till the end of September and can come and stay for as long as you like. Message me back and ask anything you want to Know. Inviting you, dose not mean to jump on the first plane, as trust has to be set between us first. I just invite you now, so we have the time to know each other chatting. Master Spiro
37. teach me how to seduce my slut mother
38. I would love to torture and fuck that white pussy. Make it become addicted to black cock and beg for it.Tie you down and cut cards with my friends to see who the winner is that gets the next 15 minutes alone with you
39. l love you
40. hi my bitch dog [unbelievably, this was from an 18yo female]
41. its been days since i my last cum ,if like to see a shaved cock with a big load for you and you want me to open my camera and watch me masturbate for you until i cum send me message to video call you now
42. would you let a shemale fuck your ass no condom haha?
43. Are you think cocksize is important to different between a sub and a dominant guy?
44. I am a real man who knows how to milk the big breast. It gives me pleasure to milk you like a cow. Add me please. Look at my Profile.
45. Do you wanna be my toilet?
46. Hi, lady. Do you want to watch how I lick and suck my cock?
47. oooh u don't imagine what u did in my cock when i saw ur sexy pic
u made me soooo horny & made me erected to da max :)
can we be close friends and have some xxx fun together ?? :)
waiting ur positive reply .. mommy :*
48. such irresisstible profile Jolanda, brings so much plesure like drop of great wine which slips on my lips, and now i wannt whole botlle, and more,more...
49. [This was from Collarspace but it was so crazy i just HAD to share...]
How bad do the mosquitoes get there in the spring?? Ill pay you 1000 dollars if you take me out where there real real bad. Tie me up remove my pants and leave me out there 2 hours before sun down till 3 hrs after the sun sets. We can wait until they're at their worst. then do this....
50. [i think this was the same guy under a different profile after i blocked the first one and told him to fuck off. Not sure what it means but i figure it's not lethal...]
posted your picture on return to sender as a guy posing as a chick an your blocked
51. [wtf????] STOP SPAMMING FAKER
52. ill pay you 400 buck to tie me up legs spread an use me as an ashtray ???
While i knew when i started that there would be many noteworthy opening lines to include, i didn't really envision getting to the landmark 100th entry. As the original blog was getting to be unruly and a little overwhelming in its size, i figured that 100 was a good cutoff and that it was time to start a PART 2. I have a bit of a backlog as i've held off on starting this for a while.
So here we go...
1. have you ever taken a young man's virginity?
2. i would love to go so harsh on you
3. I'd like to take you out on the street. Your fully naked only wearing a dog collar and a dildo I shove up your pussy. Me wearing a black suit. I don't fuck you yet. But I push the dildo up your pussy quite hard. I can tell you're dripping wet. So you're wearing that dog collar walking in front of me on all 4. I kick your ass because your too slow. We reach the main road. It's quite an embarrassing situation. It's cold and it's dark and just imagine your neighbors seeing you like that...I make you knee. Cars drive by. I open my pants and get out my cock and balls. I make you smell my balls and suck them. My cock is all over your face. You look so hot with my cock on your face. My cock is not yet rock hard but it's quite big yet. So now it's your turn to make me really hard and suck me. Tell me how you're going to do it! Be precise, filthy and naughty!
4. hi there.. interested in having fun? :P... salut tu aimerais qu'on se fasse du plaisir :P
5. You're a really hot woman http://xhamster.living/photos/view/5982933-103547383.html
http://xhamster.living/photos/view/5982933-104058731.html
I hope you like my cock!! Can you speak italian?
6. Hi ! How are you ? Hmm... You have perfect pics... It's really exciting... Are you interested by a young man how want to make you cum... ?
7. i d love to make you my slave! and please you as much as you want!
8. heyhey, maybe you will like this?
http://xhamster.living/movies/5350108/bestial.html
http://xhamster.living/movies/4885595/training_a_whore.html
http://xhamster.living/movies/1745195/extreme_german_gangbang_with_ginger_lang.html
happy greetings from germany. nice vids you have :)
9. luv 2 tie u up and fuck ur ass and more
10. Hi bitch im french dom no limits
11. I am trying to face up to the fact that I am a pain loving, crossdressed sissy ******. any advice?
12. id take you anywhere slave.....
13. I am a young Italian-Arabic
1.92 and DICK 23 cm
OK?
14. hi, Can you give me a wide open mouth pic to tribute?
15. i want to put my dick between these lips
16. Too bad, you're almost my mom's age, and I so want to discipline that bitch, for the c***dhood I had ..... but I respect your choice, hope you get from this sire what you're looking for, cheers
17. hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii i am siisy boy like sex i love all kind my ass so sexy and i have nice cock
18. here is a nice guy with a hard throbbing 9-inch-dick which did not cum for 6 days now. As you might guess, I am really horny right now, and I really would love to cum for a nice woman watching me releasing that huge, big load.
Message me back if you are that kind of woman :)
I have skype or yahoo :)
19. i was wondering if u would take my virginity. im 18 asian 5'5 dick, in markham. willing to travel to north york. into older woman
20. id let u tie me up n force me to cum or ruin my cumshot js..
21. Hello!
My dream is to be seduced by a milf as well as make a porno, watch it and fuck to it again
http://xhamster.living/movies/298288/booboo_kitty_foxx_maturesrock.html
this is one of my favorite videos ;) fast forward to 5:40 to the best then let me know what you think
http://xhamster.living/movies/4287138/nina_hartley_stunning_white_ass.html
Actually this is my favorite, start at 10:39 ;)
Send me some links of stuff you think id like, or your favorites as well
22. Peace be upon you..
I will pour my heart into this one.. Once and for all.
I am sorry, and I humbly ask for your forgiveness for approaching you with my selfish desires.. and I hope I have never caused you to get sexually attracted to me.
It’s like I was intending to use you,
I know you think it’s ok since its two adults with consent, but no it’s not.
You are so much greater than what you think you are.
I don’t care if you are single or married, with k**s or not, I am a Muslim, and my view on women is something that the media tend to cover with the oppression..
It’s not like women are all about being covered in black, it’s totally not like this.
You are jewelry, you are the source of beauty in this universe, and you are so precious.
I don’t want my wife, daughters or grand daughters to face things like this, to face people who approach them without actual caring about them, just for sexual gratification.
Romance in marriage do exist, just like the flowers, sunset and sunrise do exist.
And in my opinion, this life is nothing but a test , you have that free will that nobody can take from you, we all have our fantasies and things, and The God knows that, but we really need to adjust them, and this is the role of marriage.
In my religion, sec out of marriage is a major sin, and stoning is not it’s punishment as many tend to represent , many scholars believe that and it’s stated in The Qur’an . but still it’s a major sin .. Just as it’s the same in actual Christianity, the real one in which Jesus “peace be upon him” is a great prophet, but not the son of The God, just like The Islam says and the original Judaism, and all the Abrahamic monotheistic religions.
Porn is bad, we may get around this fact for years and just come to it after long years that we may not even be alive to see, just as many scientists were fought when they think the earth is round!
Seriously is this the future that we want to our c***dren and the younger generations? a future in which men and woman are trying so bad to get approved based on their images ? what about the hearts ?
Sex is not liberation, it’s the sweetest gift from The God that you can seek in Marriage.. but it outside of it, it’s our cage, and we are never free from these desires and high enough to real status of worth of us as human beings.
I know people have different circumstances, I know some are here for adventure, for money, for marriage conflicts, but all these things has solutions, it’s never as if this life is all about easiness, we get hardships and we cope and learn how to keep being at our best inspite of their presence.
This is not The Paradise.. This is Life. The place where we need to grow, to be ready for what’s coming .
I know the person on this page, He can help if He able too, whether its life advices or financial issues.. It’s a page on facebook, it’s name is “Allah you are the best to feel me” you can inbox it, or email this [email protected]
May The God bless you eternally with whom you love .
I am so sorry .
23. NICE COLLAR are you owned?
24. Hey, I'm stroking my cock on skype if you like, hockey.dad.6
25. cam sex?
26. Love your faves. It is hard to find a good white woman to tie up and enjoy. And to give her pleasure.
27. I want to sleep with you lady...
28. can i call you mom?
29. wowww nice tits come in my skype(ridlok) i love you
30. hi would u like meet me for weekly income?
31. i want you as my slave, train you and make you mine and if you want money i can pay you 4000$/month also i can travel to my slave
32. Umm sure would love to tie you up and slide my little dick up your ass and Cum all over you
33. hello whore thanks for adding me, if you are interested in chating about bdsm and fantasies feel free to reply, i enjoy abusing sluts like you [i hope it goes without saying that i did not add him...]
34. hi
Iam hamza
Iam single and so hot
i want to be my girlfriend if you interested
35. mmmm sweet submissive milf makes my cock hard
36. As very interested in you,nice sub,I have a proposal for you, of course if you can travel.I want to invite you for summer time holidays, in my villa on the sea front,for fun and holidays and let it see where it'll take us and guide you to become my loyal sub Lady,to serve and please Master who will take you to the dark side, and even beyond this, under His dominance and turn you to be His obedient sub, exploring your limits daily.I am on holidays from mid June till the end of September and can come and stay for as long as you like. Message me back and ask anything you want to Know. Inviting you, dose not mean to jump on the first plane, as trust has to be set between us first. I just invite you now, so we have the time to know each other chatting. Master Spiro
37. teach me how to seduce my slut mother
38. I would love to torture and fuck that white pussy. Make it become addicted to black cock and beg for it.Tie you down and cut cards with my friends to see who the winner is that gets the next 15 minutes alone with you
39. l love you
40. hi my bitch dog [unbelievably, this was from an 18yo female]
41. its been days since i my last cum ,if like to see a shaved cock with a big load for you and you want me to open my camera and watch me masturbate for you until i cum send me message to video call you now
42. would you let a shemale fuck your ass no condom haha?
43. Are you think cocksize is important to different between a sub and a dominant guy?
44. I am a real man who knows how to milk the big breast. It gives me pleasure to milk you like a cow. Add me please. Look at my Profile.
45. Do you wanna be my toilet?
46. Hi, lady. Do you want to watch how I lick and suck my cock?
47. oooh u don't imagine what u did in my cock when i saw ur sexy pic
u made me soooo horny & made me erected to da max :)
can we be close friends and have some xxx fun together ?? :)
waiting ur positive reply .. mommy :*
48. such irresisstible profile Jolanda, brings so much plesure like drop of great wine which slips on my lips, and now i wannt whole botlle, and more,more...
49. [This was from Collarspace but it was so crazy i just HAD to share...]
How bad do the mosquitoes get there in the spring?? Ill pay you 1000 dollars if you take me out where there real real bad. Tie me up remove my pants and leave me out there 2 hours before sun down till 3 hrs after the sun sets. We can wait until they're at their worst. then do this....
50. [i think this was the same guy under a different profile after i blocked the first one and told him to fuck off. Not sure what it means but i figure it's not lethal...]
posted your picture on return to sender as a guy posing as a chick an your blocked
51. [wtf????] STOP SPAMMING FAKER
52. ill pay you 400 buck to tie me up legs spread an use me as an ashtray ???
10 years ago
